"Thanks" to TCM guest programmer Brian Cox, I had the displeasure of watching 2 hours of Richard Harris doing his impersonation of Richard Burton doing his impersonation of Marlon Brando last night.
Bad enough whoever wrote this knew squat about professional sports (no scenes of the players practicing, training, promoting the team, etc.), we're asked to root for a self-absorbed jerk doing his impersonation of Richard Burton doing his impersonation of Marlon Brando. Harris plays a Neanderthal who thinks nothing of abusing his elderly friend, yet is a kindly father figure to his widowed landlady's two small children. Speaking of, Neanderthal fancies himself in love with Widowed Landlady, a bitter harpy who says she wants nothing to do with him, even as she sleeps with him. I don't get it, either.
To give you an idea of just how all over the place this is, Neanderthal pours his "heart" out to his teammate about Widowed Landlady, only to lower the boom on her later by telling her that her husband's death wasn't a workplace accident but a suicide, THEN tells her he loves her and needs her! Oy!
He gets the skinny on Widowed Landlady's Hubby from the owner of the team, whom he and Widowed Landlady's Hubby slaved away for in the coal mines. It will probably come as no surprise that Mrs. Team Owner fancies herself in lust with Neanderthal. Now, this is where the film lost me: our "hero" isn't without a working brain cell (he refuses to sign unless he gets £1,000 up front), yet blows the golden opportunity to own Team Owner big-time with the mash note Mrs. Team Owner sends him. Hell, he could have burned it all down at Team Owner's party, but no! Such jaw-dropping stupidity makes you question your faith in humanity!
After Widowed Landlady tosses him (only thing in this Kitchen Sink Soap Opera which makes any sense!), he and his pricey whip find themselves at a flophouse (this would have been the time for Big-Time Rugby Star to own Team Owner big-time with the mash note from Mrs. Team Owner, but I digress). One night of flophouse life and he is pounding on Widowed Landlady's door, then learns from her neighbor she is in the hospital. The Doctor tells him she has lost the will to live. Being the self-absorbed jerk he is, Neanderthal decides she is dying of a broken heart (you would think her children would be reason enough for her to want to live, but I digress again). Once she and a spider on the wall he punches out buy it, he ditches the Kindly Father Figure routine and blows off her now-orphaned children waiting outside her room. He then breaks into her flat for his "Hey, Stella!" moment.
Richard Burton and (dare I say it) Marlon Brando deserve better.
Bad enough whoever wrote this knew squat about professional sports (no scenes of the players practicing, training, promoting the team, etc.), we're asked to root for a self-absorbed jerk doing his impersonation of Richard Burton doing his impersonation of Marlon Brando. Harris plays a Neanderthal who thinks nothing of abusing his elderly friend, yet is a kindly father figure to his widowed landlady's two small children. Speaking of, Neanderthal fancies himself in love with Widowed Landlady, a bitter harpy who says she wants nothing to do with him, even as she sleeps with him. I don't get it, either.
To give you an idea of just how all over the place this is, Neanderthal pours his "heart" out to his teammate about Widowed Landlady, only to lower the boom on her later by telling her that her husband's death wasn't a workplace accident but a suicide, THEN tells her he loves her and needs her! Oy!
He gets the skinny on Widowed Landlady's Hubby from the owner of the team, whom he and Widowed Landlady's Hubby slaved away for in the coal mines. It will probably come as no surprise that Mrs. Team Owner fancies herself in lust with Neanderthal. Now, this is where the film lost me: our "hero" isn't without a working brain cell (he refuses to sign unless he gets £1,000 up front), yet blows the golden opportunity to own Team Owner big-time with the mash note Mrs. Team Owner sends him. Hell, he could have burned it all down at Team Owner's party, but no! Such jaw-dropping stupidity makes you question your faith in humanity!
After Widowed Landlady tosses him (only thing in this Kitchen Sink Soap Opera which makes any sense!), he and his pricey whip find themselves at a flophouse (this would have been the time for Big-Time Rugby Star to own Team Owner big-time with the mash note from Mrs. Team Owner, but I digress). One night of flophouse life and he is pounding on Widowed Landlady's door, then learns from her neighbor she is in the hospital. The Doctor tells him she has lost the will to live. Being the self-absorbed jerk he is, Neanderthal decides she is dying of a broken heart (you would think her children would be reason enough for her to want to live, but I digress again). Once she and a spider on the wall he punches out buy it, he ditches the Kindly Father Figure routine and blows off her now-orphaned children waiting outside her room. He then breaks into her flat for his "Hey, Stella!" moment.
Richard Burton and (dare I say it) Marlon Brando deserve better.