Tue, Oct 23, 1962
Jack praises Mr. Welk but insists anyone (in particular himself) can lead an orchestra-the results of his attempt to do so are classic.Later, he browbeats Lawrence into orchestrating his song "When You Say "I Beg Your Pardon Then I'll Come Back to You" A.K.A. "When the Swallows Return to Capistrano" which ends up as a polka.
Tue, Nov 27, 1962
After a run in with a crabby cameraman, Jack introduces a young Japanese girl singer, Romi Yamada. He expresses his interest in having her do a further show, but her agent drives a hard bargain, and recalls Jack's appearance on an Ed Sullivan-like show in Tokio, where Jack inserted himself into a rock-and-roll children's group.
Tue, Dec 11, 1962
Several stars' wives are planning a charity benefit in Beverley Hills, trying hard not to invite Jack, but he insinuates himself, unasked, into the event. He wanted to play his violin, but the only spot open is to referee a championship wrestling match, which he takes, but bungles it up so he gets involved in the wrestling, too.
Tue, Dec 25, 1962
In Jack's talent show, the first contestant is Mr. Finque,(Blanc) who impersonates dogs and a British horse. Don Wilson and "son" Harlow do another impersonation, this time of Ted Lewis in his "Me and My Shadow" routine. The "Renaldi brothers" do a bullet dodging act that ends badly. Jack's fan club of old ladies from Pasedena form an amateur orchestra.
Tue, Jan 15, 1963
Jack hires Rod Serling to improve his show but he winds up trapped in the Twilight Zone himself.
Tue, Jan 22, 1963
Jack is thrilled to introduce his guest, actor Peter Lorre, who seems very modest and timid - until Jack congratulates him on his ability to personify evil, spurring Lorre to pull a knife from his jacket pocket. Jack has a nightmare involving Lorre, in which Jack visits a new doctor, because the doctor takes coupons and validates parking. Also waiting for the doctor is Lorre, hiding behind a newspaper blaring the headline "Fiendish Murderer Escapes."
Tue, Feb 26, 1963
Having Martha Tilton as a guest causes him to reminisce about when they worked together with the USO during World War Two, on the island of New Guinea. During the show, Jack performs his stand-up, then starts playing his violin, when the sirens sound and enemy planes start bombing, everyone runs off but jack keeps playing. Eventually two Japanese soldiers, all that's left after a hari-kiri wave, surrender if he'll stop playing.
Tue, Apr 9, 1963
For a change of pace, Jack does a plot-less revue instead of a scripted play, by supposedly responding to questions culled from fan mail. The acts include an over the top radio sound effects man, Don and Dennis impersonate Laurel and Hardy repairing a Model T tire, and Jack playing his violin with an eccentric pianist accompanying.