Hell's Half Acre (2006 Video) User Reviews

A non-stop cheese ride indeed

[brianpatty73 · 8/10 · 16 August 2008]

I bought this DVD on a whim at the Motor City Comic Con. The DVD box described the film as "An insanely fun non-stop cheeseride" Being a fan of obscure B flicks, I just had to pick it up.

An actual full size house is burned down, a truck is tipped over, a body is lit on fire, there are gun battles involving the police, and a chaingun interrupts a community gathering! Hah! The behind the scenes segment is as fun as the movie itself. The featurette describes how the filmmakers did all this over the course of five years with absolutely NO MONEY! This was very inspiring to me. Many laugh out loud moments including the believable introduction to the film from the WAKE UP CALL FOR PARENTS organization who wants to 'ban' the film. The only thing I didn't like much is that the FX (killings)are rather crappy and the film is rather short. But, it does indeed live up to its moniker, "An insanely fun non-stop cheese-ride!" I can't think of better words to describe it. It's a hoot!

Not enough blood!

[info-18378 · 8/10 · 7 January 2009]

It would have been much cooler if this movie had more blood. Everybody just seems to gets shot. Indeed, this movie was rather weird. The killer is a ghost I think. He appears and disappears at his own will. I'm a big fan of B movies so I enjoyed it a bit, but my girlfriend hated it! The killer's mask is rather cool and there is a great scene towards the end where a girl gets a door axed down and it hits her square in the face. The behind the scenes documentary shows that it was real. The door really just hit her in the face (!) Other than that, the film revolves around a guy walking around killing random people. It is funny in parts too mostly because of the absurdity of the situations. Don't watch this expecting a true scare, you will be disappointed.

You may want to run, and RUN FAST. Or not.

[munchichi1976 · 5/10 · 25 January 2009]

What can I say about this movie? The lead girl Nicole gets stabbed in the private area, I think (Please bear with me as this movie is hard to follow).

Hell's Half Acre starts with these dopey guys that find a dead blonde on a creepy basement floor (she's unclothed of course, go figure). Upon finding the dead body, panic sets in amongst them and they kill the serial killer guy responsible for her death (Bob) and his young son (Derek). Here's the best part: This is accomplished by duct-taping them both together, dumping gasoline on them, and then lighting the duo on fire with a flare that is thrown through a window. Are you following this? The father and son burn to death as well as the entire house. Don't ask me kids. I didn't write it.

To make a long story short, this "killer ghost p*ssed-off guy" comes back from the dead or something (again, it's hard to follow) and he just randomly kills things for the next hour or so (one younger boy gets his hand lopped off while playing basketball in a park and his friends are all gunned down with a handgun!!???). I have to say, as dumb as this all was, (Yes, it is DUMB!, no argument there) my friends and I thoroughly enjoyed it. It is funny whether intentional or not. I think it is supposed to be funny. Anyone?

There is one scene where a group of townspeople are gathered in a meeting or something (Again, bear with me here) and the masked skull head guy comes in and shoots everyone for no apparent reason at all. Ridiculous right?

If you have a bit of a warped sense of humor like myself, and enjoy an occasional bad but fun obscure movie than this a MUST-SEE! I can best describe this film as a cross between SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS and Friday THE 13th directed by someone who loves action films. If this sort of thing doesn't appeal to you then RUN and RUN REALLY FAST. Hell's Half Acre really must be seen to be believed. It is as good as it is STUPID. Hard to explain. I'm speechless.

hell's cheesy acre

[trashgang · 5/10 · 12 May 2009]

I noticed an advertisement in fango about this flick, collecting horrorflicks I ordered it. The communication between the production and me was perfect, they signed my copy and I received it extremely fast. In between I visited the site of the movie to read everything about it, it wasn't a low budget it was a no budget, so what could I expect, nothing. I have seen a lot coming from Hollywood that has been promoted as good or better then....so I plugged it in and watched my copy. The movie starts off with what did me remind of those early years, the video nasties. Some people out to search and destroy those horrors. If it was a set up or real I couldn't tell because I don't live in the states but been their a few times I can expect that nowadays there are still some conquistadors out there. Weird that they never attacked as far as I know the August Underground ones. Anyway. You can see that the movie was made with love and addiction. And for me there are some scene's that made me think of the classic ones, the scene in the pick up, well, that was Maniac wasn't it? Having no budget means having no effects so they had to do the slashing and beating off screen, that's a bit of a pity that it doesn't have more blood or gore in it but the score and the editing does their work. That it clocks in under an hour doesn't makes it boring. So a big cheer to the crew out their who did a great job.

Hell's half acre,half of a movie ,but a good half.

[djangozelf-12351 · 5/10 · 20 August 2015]

There is a lot to like about this short horror flick but sadly time and budget are a big issue here.

The first 10 to 15 minutes can be fast forwarded it's some strange introduction to the movie leaving you with 45 minutes of actual mayhem.

This time is well spend and the pacing is good and it tells the story well even with it's limited resources.

They also experimented a little with the camera and put more effort into making this something more than your average slasher.

I really hope they re-do this movie with more budget and some depth to the characters and make in to the classic slasher movie it could have been.

For now I recommend this for anyone who got 45 minutes to spare and in for a good scare to go watch this.

This deserves multiple sequels and a franchise.

But,I'm a big horror fan so... if your not you might disagree on that.

For me this mini movie worked but I hope it grows to maxi.

Half a movie but at full speed ahead.

$150,000?

[digger-06358 · 2/10 · 28 June 2019]

Wasn't going to write a review for this thing, but if this prevents even one person from watching this, then I will have done my part.

If you gave a bunch of ten to twelve year olds a camera and a hundred dollars and told them to make a movie with lots of fake deaths, no story, and nothing logical happening, it would likely be better done than this garbage. How these people spent as much money as they did on this mystifies me. It wasn't spent on special effects, nor on a story, certainly not on the performers, I can not in good conscience call them actors, nor on anything else that can be seen in this film. Maybe they ate at expensive restaurants while making this and spent the money on that.

This thing starts with an incredibly fake public message warning others than this movie is too shocking and disturbing for your children to watch. Not because of the violence, blood or adult themes. But in fact because it is the worst possible way to spend 45 minutes ever. Watch your toaster and it will offer more entertainment value. Nobody should watch this because it is beyond horrible. The only violence is pretty much that which is shown during the public service announcement. The rest is just done for effect. Nothing added to the story at all. Not that there is much story. Almost indestructible guy kills random people. Unbeknown to us he is highly flammable and gets burned to death. Sorry for the spoilers, but this way you won't need to watch to see the story.

Even though this is a rather short film, don't be fooled as it will seem to waste more time than expected.

For all it's silliness, it's apparent the filmmakers knew exactly what kind of film they liked...

[irishelvis06 · 9/10 · 22 August 2008]

Having actually been involved in a few projects of this no budget level, and having seen more than a few of them, I can only say: Bravo! Hell's Half Acre has a sick twisted energy that far surpasses other productions of the same financial level. And, for me, the biggest and best surprise: HHA busts stuff up!

Forever my biggest gripe against no budget horror films has been: Everyone looks like they are afraid to make a mess. Doors are opened, not knocked down. Victims are only slashed to death in tile bathrooms, where the blood is easy to wash away. Or worse yet, people only seem to die and bleed on convenient towels! Well monsters don't work that way. They don't care!

Fist time film makers take the time to think out character's thoughts, reasons, and actions, but never stop to think how unlikely it is that horrible events will all happen cleanly! These guys seem to go out of their way to make a mess. *Doors are blasted open with splinters flying, (sometimes visibly clobbering hapless actresses)! *Car windows (Yes! Car windows!) are smashed. *Monster (or at least their dummy representatives) are hurled off 12 story buildings. *Cars are turned over. *People bleed on walls. *People are killed or chopped up outside! Not hidden in indoor studios where the public can't accidentally glimpse it. *TV's are smashed. On Heads! *And for cripes sake: An entire house is burned down! For the movie. Not stock movie footage. Add to all this, the use of a real Jail Cell, real fireman, real fire trucks. Too many times I've seen a barn studio be an office, a bedroom, a bar, a police station, etc. Usually by moving the chairs around. It's refreshing to see a production take the time and energy to find real locations. And encouraging to see a community so eager to help.

Most of the cast is very natural, and comes off seeming like real people. Val the babysitter, comes off so fun, natural, and energetic in her behind the scenes footage, that I find it a pity she wasn't alive in the actual movie a little longer. She would have made a great survivor, instead of victim.

The heroine, Tesia is a joy to watch. We don't really get enough time to get to know her. So, unlike her contemporary counter parts, Sigourney Weaver, Jamie Lee Curtis, other women who were pushed far enough to stop running and turn on their monsters,we might care a little less what happens to her. But the movie is still fun when her butt-kicking commences. As a fan of the whole Scream Queen scene, though, someone should tell her I would have been Okay with her lingerie scene being a bit longer. ...oh well.

The behind the scenes reel is as fun as the movie. News stories in the movie look and feel absolutely real. Another stumbling point of many first time horror filmmakers. However, one possible minor disappointment: The promotional use of The "Wake Up Call For Parents" piece is so good, that I'm not sure the movie can live up to what the promo promises. One expects to be absolutely repulsed. A bad thing for concerned parents, but a promise of greatness for fans. The revulsion of Dawn in the promo, isn't, and probably never could be, matched by the actual horrors of the movie.

I enjoyed the crap out of HHA. For all it's silliness, it's apparent the filmmakers knew exactly what kind of film they liked. Then they went out, grabbed that kind of movie, twisted the plot to near perversion, cranked up the power to overload, and vomited it out all over whoever they could get to watch it. And I suspect they were laughing the whole time.

I know I was!

-M Manik