Tales from the Crypt: Cold War is set in London where two bumbling thieves & lovers Ford (Ewan McGregor) & Cammy (Jane Horrorcks) have an argument after a robbery gone wrong & Cammy walks out on Ford. Cammy ends up at a bar where she meets a guy named Jimmy Pickett (Colin Salmon) & invites him back to the apartment to make Ford jealous but Jimmy has a dark somewhat surprising secret although Ford & Cammy aren't exactly without their own surprising revelations as the situation turns increasingly messy...
This Tales from the Crypt story was episode 6 from season 7 & one has to say that yet again season seven has thrown up potentially the worst Tales from the Crypt episode ever with this frankly rancid & moronic story. The script was based on a story from the 'Tales from the Crypt' comic book & I don't quite know where to begin, the programme starts off by introducing two of the dumbest robbers in telly history as they wear no disguises, use their own car, carry guns in plain view of everyone & are so stupid plan to rob banks which have closed down & been turned in laundrettes (do they not actually plan their robberies at all more than say a year in advance?). Then there's the annoying character's with the air-headed dumb bimbo Cammy really irritating & grating on my nerves, this light hearted comedy approach just doesn't work as Tales from the Crypt is far more effective when black humour is used rather than than out & out slapstick & just plain silliness. The story itself sucks with several twist's that come quite literally out of nowhere, the twist's almost seem random in their execution & the end is an absolute mess featuring a Vampire & a couple of zombies with no sort of explanation or point behind either. A really, really bad episode all round with a weak almost random story, a rubbish twist & yet another very silly tone which seems to go for comedy.
Agaian set in London like all of season seven there's a shop shoot-out at the start & a Vampire at the end who gets a spear in it's stomach in the episodes sole gore highlight. I must admit I found the music really annoying in Cold War, especially the highly irritating track that runs over the opening credits as the robbers drive along in the red Jag. There's no scares here, no atmosphere & the since the tone is more camp than anything else there's no tension either. There's a decent cast here including Hollywood A-lister Ewan McGregor as well as British actors Jane Horrocks & Colin Salomon although they all seem rather embarrassed to be there & the performances are not good.
Cold War is maybe my least favourite Tales from the Crypt episode ever, it's certainly right down there with the worst episodes the show has to offer although I can't quite decide if it's as bad as Last Respects (1996) or not.
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