mudtitan Reviews

Breaking Bad: No Más (2010) Season 3, Episode 1

Write a headline for your review here

[10/10 · 18 January 2023]

"Who's here for self improvement? ... See, that's your first mistake; you should be here to learn self-acceptance."

"Self-hatred, guilt. It accomplishes nothing. It just stands in the way (of) true change."

I won't go into unnecessary personal details, but I needed this episode, right here, right now. I suppose I have a character limit to meet, so here goes a little story about why this episode means so much to me.

I started watching Breaking Bad about two weeks ago to fill a void in my life that was growing by the day. This is unusual because I hardly watch TV shows at all. After entering that low point, I knew that I needed something to clear my mind. Based on glowing reviews and friend recommendations, I decided that I might as well give it a shot. What could I lose? I was immediately hooked, watching episodes per day, sometimes upwards of five or six! Then I began to become busier and more overwhelmed by, well, everything. I felt like I needed the numbness more than ever, to completely escape reality. Then I hear the quotes that began this review. Again, I will spare the personal details, but I needed that so badly. This review does no justice to the impact "No Más" just had for my outlook on life.

I suppose all of this goes to say, "you never know what might change somebody's life" or "sometimes you don't know what you're looking for until you've found it." Those match how I'm feeling now.

TDF Really Works (2011)

Unfunny, uninventive, and unenjoyable

[3/10 · 16 August 2022]

Needless to say, the humor of Ari Aster's "TDF Really Works" is juvenile. In all honesty, it felt nothing short of a bad YouTube skit. The best thing I can say about this short is that I laughed a little, though some of that was due to cringe. To think that this was released after "The Strange Thing about the Johnsons" is mind boggling.

Rating: F+, horrible.

Dominion (2018)

Heartbreaking

[9/10 · 16 August 2022]

Dominion was so close to being the best documentary I've ever seen. Of all things, I first heard of this documentary from a Mr. Incredible meme. It was the last film shown, so I checked it out. It has a 9.0 rating, and I saw that Joaquin Phoenix narrated parts of it, so I put it in my watchlist. Come to find out, the documentary was available in 4K on YouTube for free. Though horrifying, all adults should watch it. It's insightful at worst, transformative at best.

Not for the faint of heart, Dominion mostly shows behind-the-scenes footage of how animals are mistreated in slaughterhouses. The documentary moves on by segments from one breed of animal to the next, which results in some monotony but also shows that the cruelty happens throughout the entire animal industry.

The only film that has had a greater emotional impact on me than this is Schindler's List. Similarly, Dominion created a perpetual sense that I needed to cry from beginning to end. Now, I've listened to my fair share of heavy music with completely indiscernible vocals, such as Acrania's "Disillusion in a Discordant System," but I have yet to hear anything scream in such agony and fear as those pigs in the first segment. That was chilling.

Dominion dispels any ounce of belief that "maybe this cheeseburger is different?" or that "maybe this cow was treated humanely?" The uncensored footage is brutally convincing, and it perfectly shows that the meat and fur industries are more monstrous than you would assume.

As moving and frightening as it was, there is no answer to the predicament presented by Dominion. Sure, you could become a vegan, but what will that solve? In fact, I actually considered this, but I realized that I am one person out of billions. The lack of my monetary support will do nothing to end the abominably cruel treatment of animals. How about some legislature to ban it? It would never pass. People enjoy animal products far too much to change their lifestyles. There are wonderful alternatives out there, but people will by and large refuse to adapt because they're simply used to it. Perhaps if every adult watched this documentary, as I suggested, more attention would be brought to better the treatment of animals.

As striking and powerful as the message of Dominion is, what is a realistic solution? Perhaps only time will tell. On the other hand, if the amount of casualties in every human war combined is equal to the amount of animals killed for for food every three days, do we really have that kind of time?

Rating: A.

Antichrist (2009)

"Chaos reigns."

[6/10 · 12 August 2022]

I have never had such a love/hate relationship with a director like I have with Lars von Trier. His films are beautiful, yet they dare you to loathe them. They are as strenuous to watch as they would be horrific to live out. Antichrist is no different.

The direction and cinematography are amazing, yet Antichrist is so difficult to get through. The acting is absolutely breathtaking; Willem Dafoe is one of the greatest actors of all time, and Charlotte Gainsbourg always works well with Lars von Trier's style. With the acts of sexual violence and blatant misogyny, Antichrist leaves a poor taste in the mouths of the audience.

The rest contains some minor spoilers. The "nature is Satan's church" line was an odd take on the Mother Nature archetype. I'm all for original ideas, but the implications of this are quite problematic. At another point, Gainsbourg says that "a crying woman is a scheming woman." If you don't get the picture by now, women are certainly vilified in Antichrist. While there are some gross lines, there are other lines that I actually like. For example, "chaos reins" was entirely haunting and probably one of my favorite movie quotes.

One odd problem I have noticed with Lars von Trier's movies, apart from being hard to watch, is that they're edited in weird ways. I don't like the editing during some scenes. Fortunately, nothing in Antichrist was as poorly edited as the wedding dinner scene from Melancholia.

All things said, while Antichrist is technically well-made in most aspects, I cannot support the message. It hinders my enjoyment of the film by a substantial margin.

Rating: D+

Eraserhead (1977)

The antidote for monotony

[9/10 · 12 August 2022]

"Eraserhead" was the antidote to me binging the Nightmare on Elm Street franchise. I was pretty burned out of watching movies in general, and boom. Allow me to introduce "Eraserhead!" It was my first experience with surrealist cinema, although I learned about and did some surrealism in my high school days. I'd heard great things, and great things I did find. There are tons of original ideas and the baby's design looks amazing! If you like weird, somewhat pretentious movies, you'll love this film. I won't spoil anything, so go watch it!

Rating: A.

The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)

Overly hated, unfairly dismissed

[6/10 · 12 August 2022]

I don't remember the first time I heard about "The Human Centipede (First Sequence)," for it seems to have been engrained in my head for as long as I can remember. I'd always heard that it was nothing more than a sick, depraved movie for the disturbed. After all, it's quite a graphic concept to have three people sewn mouth-to-anus and kept as a pet. Lately, I've started to hear people say that it's not as graphic as people would assume, similar to "Saw" not being nearly as graphic as its premise sounds. I'd also heard that I've already seen more graphic movies, so I decided to give it a go.

Overall, I'm not disappointed in my choice. I actually enjoyed seeing the movie play out, believe it or not. As I'd recently heard, it was far less graphic than I'd imagined. There was less blood than a typical slasher would have, and the nudity was usually obscured. I'm glad that there was no sexual violence in the movie, as I assumed that something so depraved would probably have some. That being said, it was still disturbing. At the end of the day, the premise is still subhuman, but that doesn't mean it was created just for shocks. Like I said, it was tamer than it sounds.

There are interesting parallels between Dr. Heiter and fascism in World War II. I'd recommend listening to Dead Meat's podcast episode about the movie to learn more about this. Speaking of the podcast, my opinion started off similarly to James's, though Chelsea managed to slightly shift my opinion, such as some of the interesting shots I'd overlooked. Then again, there are still some annoying horror tropes in the movie that prevent me from calling it a good movie.

Rating: D.

Killer's Kiss (1955)

Short, bland movie

[6/10 · 12 August 2022]

Killer's Kiss is a so-so movie. If I'm being honest, I don't remember it all that well. I was disinterested in the story. It wasn't bad, but it was a story I've seen time and time again; no impression was left. It was well shot and I wasn't too bored during the runtime, but it could have been less trite.

Rating: D-

Spartacus (1960)

I am Spartacus!

[8/10 · 11 August 2022]

The fight for freedom is a most honorable fight. Though Stanley Kubrick's 1960 epic, Spartacus, is hailed as a classic, I was skeptical going in. I'd heard that it was Kubrick's worst apart from his first two, which showed little promise compared to his later films. This is only partially true.

From the opening scene, I could tell that Kubrick had not written the script. The dialogue was not bad as much as it was blunt. It was statement after statements rather than discussions; I prefer Kubrick's approach to dialogue. In fact, very little of this film felt Kubrickian. The only semblance on Kubrick's directorial flare was the cinematography. Though Russell Metty was in charge of the cinematography, it is abundantly clear in some shots that Kubrick tried to have some kind of control over the way scenes were shot. In fact, this is the least Kubrick out of all of his films. I was initially turned off by this, but I decided to overlook this and enjoy the film as it is instead of what it could have been if Kubrick had full control over the film.

I am not too familiar with the structure of epics, though I thoroughly enjoy them. As long as it can keep my attention, I deeply appreciate the extra time to get to know the characters. It adds gravity to the outcome of the story. Every choice and step of the narrative is meaningful because I care about the characters and what happens to them. At the same time, several scenes could have been trimmed up just a bit to get the runtime around three hours at most.

Spartacus as a character is someone to aspire to be. He is charismatic, just, and a leader by nature. Conversely, he is faultless. He does no wrong throughout the runtime and consistently makes the right decisions with no hesitation. While this is nice and optimistic, it ultimately detracts from his humanity; his perfection is unattainable. Spartacus's character almost resembles Christ, especially during the final scene. The parallels between Jesus and Spartacus work well considering his flawless nature, though Spartacus does kill at some points. The practical effects and stunt work were spectacular for 1960 standards. It's cliché to say, but it honestly looks better than a ton of modern-day effects.

Overall, Spartacus is a classic that delivers a compelling narrative but could have been bettered if it was trimmed down a bit and if Kubrick had complete artistic control of the movie. The legend of Spartacus is one to be remembered and inspired by.

Rating: B+

Tusk (I) (2014)

Wallace the Bologna Man

[7/10 · 11 August 2022]

I believe that a part of everyone has a burning desire to be disturbed in some sense, even if it's out of curiosity. Kevin Smith's Tusk is perhaps the most disturbing comedy I've ever seen, even in the premise; a man is turned into a walrus. Oh boy...

The first act is noticeably well directed. It's funny and builds suspense as you realize what Wallace is in for. Then the story has an abrupt change of tone; instead of being a traditional comedy, it resorts to little more than shock humor. I understand that this is intentional, though I preferred the first act. After all, anybody can create something shockingly absurd. Then again, the fact that this started as a joke on a podcast and eventually became a movie is absolutely hilarious to me.

Perhaps something's wrong with me for laughing at the final "fight" scene. On the other hand, it's like a car crash I can't look away from. My curiosity is enough to keep watching while the sick, twisted part of me finds it hilarious. Apart from the tonal shift, my biggest problem was Johnny Depp's character... I didn't care too much for his personality and could hardly understand what he was saying. I've visited Canada a few times, and nobody has ever been so difficult to understand.

Tusk is likely to be adored by most fans of dark comedy and body horror. I just wish that it would have stuck to the tone of the first act.

Rating: C.

The Strange Thing About the Johnsons (2011)

Well, the Johnsons sure are strange...

[8/10 · 11 August 2022]

Talk about a thrilling short film! "The Strange Thing about the Johnsons" is probably the most intense short I've seen. Even disturbing from the opening shots, the first twist is a jaw-dropping shock for anyone who doesn't know the plot of the film.

First of all, Pawel Pogorzelski's cinematography is top notch, especially the framing and camera movements. Ari Aster's direction and script are also nice, though the screenplay does have some faults toward the end, which I will get into later.

"The Strange Thing about the Johnsons" follows a family in which a son sexually abuses his father. It's an interesting take on a broken, exploitative family dynamic that I've frankly never seen before. Of course the mother knows, but how could she say anything? It would be embarrassing to discuss as a family, and if brought up in a lawsuit, could put her son behind bars. She's confronted by a harrowing dilemma. Ultimately, she chooses the easy way, which is unfortunate what most families do; she turns a blind eye to her son's abuse.

The story starts with Isaiah's sexual obsession with his father, a poet named Sidney, but his fantasies become reality on prom night. By the time prom comes around, Isaiah is finally big enough to take advantage of Sidney. Of course, Sidney is traumatized. Years later, Sidney writes a confession entitled "Cocoon Man," which details his abuse. Like many abuse victims, he believes that he is as guilty as his son for letting it happen. Isaiah discovers a copy of "Cocoon Man" and confronts his father about it, making sure his father knows that the story will never be heard. Some time later, Sidney goes out to presumably get the work published, but Isaiah takes notice once again.

This is where the screenplay starts to fall apart. Sidney runs out the door and is hit by a vehicle, which kills him. It was a rather cliché and abrupt death. Another issue with this scene is that the driver gets out of the car and says absolutely nothing. He simply stands silently beside the man he has just killed, which took me out of the movie for a bit.

Luckily, the story picks back up, and Isaiah's mom, Joan, confronts him by asking why his father cried after driving him home from prom. This leads to mother and son in an altercation, resulting in Joan sustaining injuries and Isaiah's death. Joan burns her copy of "Cocoon Man," symbolizing how secrets of abuse die with families and never make it out to the world. It's a cold, uncomfortable truth that countless families live with in secret. "The Strange Thing about the Johnsons" simply adds a twist with the son as the abuser, steering clear of grooming and cuts straight to the fact that abuse happens.

I've heard some people say that Sidney started the abuse, but there is only shaky, easily disproven evidence for this. We are shown in the opening scene that Isaiah is sexually attracted to his dad, while Sidney shows no sexual interest in exploiting his son when he walks in on him. In the first "Cocoon Man" scene, Sidney writes that he is guilty because he, as mentioned, believes that he should have been able to stop it and that it should have never happened. Now the abuse just happens, and there is nothing he can do to stop it. He can't tell anyone because his wife ignores it, and he loves his son; he doesn't want to incriminate him. In the second confrontational scene, Isaiah is only gaslighting his father by telling him that he enjoys it. As seen in the writing, New Year's, and bathroom scenes, Sidney is horrified of his son and his abuse. There is no possible way that Sidney is compliant in the abuse.

Though the script's final act includes some lazy writing, "The Strange Thing about the Johnsons" is a beautifully shot discussion of how abuse manifests itself in families and never reaches the light of a courtroom. Oftentimes families find it too difficult to discuss or can't bring themselves to address the abuse in any other way. How do you tell your son to stop abusing his father? He will not listen. How do you tell law enforcement about your son's abuse? It's hard to discuss and they will either not believe you or your son will be prosecuted. To be the reason your son is imprisoned, regardless of if he wronged you, is heart-wrenching for most parents, and it is heart-wrenching for audiences to witness as well.

Rating: B+

Top Gun (1986)

Fun flying, but narratively disappointing

[6/10 · 4 August 2022]

All things said, Top Gun is understandably a classic movie. Maverick is charming, some scenes are emotional, and the action is tense. However, Top Gun is narratively disappointing.

The plot tends to jump around without much care for where the story leads, and it never feels consistent. A movie does not need to be predictable, but it should at least have a solid narrative. More than anything, Top Gun feels like a montage of scenes from a well-structured movie. Had the narrative been better, I could have found myself more engaged in the story. Instead we are left with a fun movie that leaves little room for thought.

Rating: D+

Uncharted (2022)

A mediocre Indiana Jones movie with Peter Parker and Mark Wahlberg

[5/10 · 1 August 2022]

Almost everything about Uncharted is... okay. The chemistry between the cast is good, although the characters were miscast. I enjoyed the falling-out-of-a-plane sequence. Other than that, it felt like Indiana Jones: The Lost Gold of Magellan starring Peter Parker and Mark Wahlberg. Antonio Banderas' character was underutilized, which was upsetting.

The ending was predictable, but it wasn't terrible. There are also some conveniences in the movie too that are never explained. It felt a little bloated too; an hour and a half would have been just fine. It's an alright watch with the family on a rainy Sunday afternoon, but it isn't much else. Why not watch an actual Indiana Jones movie?

Rating: F+, not worth the time.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)

A worthy sequel to the beloved 1984 classic

[7/10 · 1 August 2022]

A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors was a fun and creative addition to the Nightmare franchise! I know a lot of people who prefer it to the original, but I don't.

The kills were fantastic: many were just as good if not better than the original. It also added to the narrative of the first movie, completely retconning the Freddy's Revenge. Although I liked Freddy's Revenge, I do believe that that was the best choice. Dream Warriors took what made the original Nightmare so amazing and put its twist on it, keeping the charm while being original! Oh, and the dream warriors themselves! They were great.

While I prefer the darker tone and Craven's direction in the original film more, Dream Warriors is certainly a worthy sequel! I completely understand why some people prefer it to the original.

Rating: C.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)

This might be heresy, but I love this movie!

[7/10 · 1 August 2022]

I watched A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge on a whim because I was bored. At the time, I didn't love the first Nightmare all that much and hadn't seen it in a while either. To my surprise, I was met with an outrageously fun movie I'd heard awful things about. Does it make any sense in the continuity of the franchise? No lmao, of course not. With movies like Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare, I have a hard time understanding how anyone could care about continuity in this franchise.

Why does Freddy need Jesse's body? We have no clue. It's never explored in any other movies in the franchise. Why can Freddy manifest himself and his powers in the real world now? We're never told. Why does Freddy never try to do these things again? I couldn't tell you.

All I know is that Freddy's Revenge was a funny movie that didn't take itself too seriously. Freddy makes a parakeet kill another parakeet and then make it spontaneously combust... and Jesse's dad blames him for making the bird go berserk and explode. How could that not be funny? Of course it doesn't make much sense; it clearly never meant to. I wouldn't have become such a fan of the Nightmare franchise if I hadn't had so much fun with this movie. If you don't enjoy it, forget about the continuity of the franchise and just have a good time.

Rating: C.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

Wes Craven's first gift to slashers

[8/10 · 1 August 2022]

A Nightmare on Elm Street gave birth to one of the best and most creative horror icons: Freddy Krueger. He's funny yet frightening, and I've yet to mention his memorable 'fit and his signature glove... in fact, you could say he's to die for!

Wes Craven's direction and vision for A Nightmare on Elm Street is unmatched by most horror movies. He balances humor and suspense with the ingenious concept of a child murderer exacting his revenge in deadly dreams. The kills and practical effects are memorable and beloved by both fans and critics alike. Everything culminates to create a classic 80's slasher that will be remembered for generations. It's an amazing movie up until the final scene, which could have been completely left out, but I won't spoil anything. If you haven't seen it yet, what are you waiting for? Go watch it!

Rating: B.

Jason X (2001)

Jason goes to space

[4/10 · 31 July 2022]

I honestly expected to enjoy this movie. People either say that this film is a campy blast or that it is one of, if not the worst of the franchise. Knowing that I enjoy campy horror movies done right, I assumed that this would be fun. Oh boy, was I wrong.

Jason X has a few laughs, such as the "we love premarital sex!" line, but that is hardly enough to save it. At the end of the day, it is a dumb movie with bad acting, forgettable characters, and nowhere near enough fun kills to save it. However, the frozen head kill might be my favorite of the franchise. Fortunately for Jason, this was an improvement over the previous two movies in the Friday the 13th franchise.

Rating: F, bad.

Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare (1991)

Truly puts the "nightmare" into the franchise name

[2/10 · 31 July 2022]

I'd be here all day tearing Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare to pieces. The worst insult I can give this monstrosity is that I almost considered giving it the dreaded rating of "Jaws: The Revenge," a category so painful that I named it after the only film to have earned it.

Rating: F, one of the worst.

The French Dispatch (2021)

Anderson's best is a love letter to storytellers

[9/10 · 31 July 2022]

The French Dispatch is Wes Anderson's best. It was beautifully comical and masterfully directed. I love how disjointed it is; it is a perfect reflection of why The French Dispatch's articles were so unique. The film is an anthology of articles brought to life on the big screen and displays the wonderful quirks of the authors, the strange tangents they indulge themselves in writing, and everything they deem important, regardless of if it is. This is undoubtedly Anderson's most artistic, most "Wes Anderson" film, yet its originality is almost jarring. At first it might seem pointless, but it is art at its finest. Anderson shows no focus or desire for the the plot of The French Dispatch. As seen in his other movie, he clearly understands how to craft an engaging plot, but he chose to overlook it for The French Dispatch and go straight to the heart of what makes The French Dispatch such a magnificent newspaper. Beautiful.

Rating: A.

Flying Padre (1951)

Boring but inoffensive short

[5/10 · 31 July 2022]

There is nothing remarkable about Flying Padre other than demonstrating that Stanley Kubrick can direct a simple short. It does a fine job showing that he can direct, but that doesn't change the fact that there is next to no plot or substance in it. I would not call Flying Padre bad, but it has nothing to offer and can certainly be skipped.

Rating: F, not worth the time.

Day of the Fight (1951)

A mediocre documentary elevated by Kubrick's name

[6/10 · 31 July 2022]

I have never cared much about sports, but my favorite director is Stanley Kubrick, so I wasn't quite sure what to think going into this short documentary. After all, I'll be the first to say that Kubrick's work up until The Killing was rather bland.

As no exception to the aforementioned rule, Day of the Fight is bland. There is no style and little substance; there is nothing special that elevates it from any other short documentary about boxing. In fact, the main reason it's remembered is because it was directed by Stanley Kubrick, and it only served as one of the stepping stones to pave the way to his future success.

On the other hand, Day of the Fight gave me a much needed appreciation for the world of sports. I'd never before considered the gravity behind an athlete's performance; it determines their career and the ultimate success of their livelihood. I enjoyed the emphasis on Nat's nervousness about waiting for the fight more so than the fight itself. These aspects culminate to a decently suspenseful boxing match, marking the first time I have cared about a sport. Though Day of the Fight was successful as a documentary for me, it is still a forgettably bland movie.

Rating: D.

Signs (2002)

Better with time

[9/10 · 27 April 2021]

Upon first viewing, I would give this a 7 or an 8. I have now seen it 5 times over the years and it gets better every single time. Everything is done superbly, nothing else needs to be said. At worst, some dialogue can occasionally feel cliché, but that's the only criticism I have.

Donnie Darko (2001)

Truly a work of art

[10/10 · 12 April 2021]

Donnie Darko has to be my favorite movie of all time. I love everything about it: the score, cinematography, imagery, acting, plot... everything is perfect. The score is so phenomenal that whenever I listen to it, I can link each track with its corresponding scene from the movie, but then again, I've probably heard the soundtrack more times than I've seen the movie. Even though Gary Joules' cover of "Mad World" is the best known song from the soundtrack, I associate the song "Killing Moon" by Echo and the Bunnymen more with the movie, and it's the perfect song for the movie. It fits flawlessly and makes the intro all-the-more memorable. Nobody can review this movie without mentioning Frank the Bunny. His outfit is maybe the most iconic part of the entire movie. His voice is haunting and his mask, once seen, can never be forgotten. The only problem I think anybody can find with this movie is it's ambiguity. After the watch this, make sure to research it and listen to theories about what it means, and make sure you watch the director's cut too. It makes the movie make a lot of sense. I would do a deep dive into the plot, but I have to keep this spoiler free. Anyways, 100/100, absolutely flawless and a true work of art.