jdbeatty Reviews

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly (1966)

The restored version a lot less choppy

[9/10 · 13 May 2003]

As broadcast it was a real surprise. The Civil War isn't just tacked on for effect, characters don't just materialize, there is some more continuity (about fifteen minutes got added back in). Technically the color's cleaned up and the sound moderated.

Ending's the same, story's the same, but a better-told story.

Spy Game (2001)

A "Spy Who Came In From the Cold" for the 21st Century

[8/10 · 25 March 2003]

This film shows one of the last of the HUMINT handlers (human intelligence, that which comes from people) in CIA retiring, and trying to pull a Joe out of jam as his last act. The political infighting and sniping that is almost everything that happens at Langley accurately shows how badly CIA has deteriorated from the peak of it's powers in the 1960s.

By the time this film takes place (ca 1991) CIA is mostly concerned with not getting caught in the same room as an opinion (which is easy with satellite pictures and signal intercepts since they can be interpreted in so many ways), and messy HUMINT people like Muir and Bishop (that can verify their other sources) are viewed as dangerous dinosaurs. Small wonder then that on 9/11 CIA was busy making diversity quilts, having been forbidden to use foreign agents by Willie Jeff two years before, and fact-found into impotence by nearly twenty years of Congressional interference into matters they knew nothing about.

The time line in the film is all screwed up (the last US combat troops pulled out of Vietnam by 1973), but we've seen a lot worse (like The English Patient). Redford is better than average (here he actually tried to fill a role, not make a statement). Pitt is showing some more versatility. Like most Redford movies it's just a little too long, but not as bad as "Horse Whisperer" or a few others.

The Others (2001)

Of all the endings this film could have had, the last you expect is the one you saw

[8/10 · 6 March 2003]

Without too much of a spoiler, I've see a LOT worse than this.

Though Nicole Kidman is not that much of an actress, she was credible enough to carry it off here (even Demi Moore did well in "Ghost"). I suppose what was more surprising was the real lack of precognition here: what you saw wasn't what you were seeing.

Fight Club (1999)

It dosen't get much worse than this

[4/10 · 6 March 2003]

This is one of the worst wastes of celluloid ever, right up there with Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, Swordfish and Leonard Part 6. The plot is practically nonexistant, the acting abysmal, the progress of the presented storyline bizzare and illogical, and the ending pointless. Nihilism is NOT it's own reward, no matter how you butter it up.

POTENTIAL SPOILER: Destroying everything you can lay hands on is not a purpose in life, it's just destruction. Any fool can destroy.

The Matrix (1999)

If there was a plot, where was it?

[1/10 · 6 March 2003]

This is a disorganized mess on the order of Pulp Fiction: I thought the reels were in the wrong order, and I had a videotape! Internally inconsistent, horribly overacted, special-effects blinded, the whole thing is an excuse for the tired "man against machine" plot.

Cool special effects cannot save everything, and even a stellar actor can't if given a rotten script. This is a few hours of my life I want back!

The Shootist (1976)

Last curtain call for a legend

[8/10 · 6 March 2003]

When this flm was making the crew had to have known that this was Wayne's last film -- he almost certainly did. The best part about this final outing for The Quiet Man was the overall consistency of his work, the value he put into craftsmanship of presentation, even though he had to have acknowledged the inevitability of the end.

Dramatically staid and somewhat predicable, the Universal Gunfighter ended his life as he lived it -- hard and fast. Only Baby (Bacall) of the other cast had any significance, and she was there just because Maureen O'Hara, the obvious choice for the part, wasn't available.

Fail Safe (1964)

The most frightening film ever made

[10/10 · 6 March 2003]

No sci-fi or monster movie could ever come close. Those of us who understand that it _was_ indeed possible (and to a certain extent still is) that an accidental war break out where no one can stop it. THIS WAS FOR REAL!

One of the most poigniant lines ever delivered on film: "What do we say to the dead?"

The Mothman Prophecies (2002)

Another waste of celluloid with Gere in it

[1/10 · 10 February 2003]

The book was pretty hopeless, and this is no better. No plot to speak of, a jumble of contradiciting impressions, lots of bad acting. There is no suspense whatsoever, no thrills of any stripe, in fact very little interest. My wife, who's been known to jump at Mike Hammer films, fell asleep watching this wretched mess.

The Defiant Ones (1958)

Courageous for its time

[10/10 · 10 February 2003]

Race in America has never been simple, and this film's themes has never tried to simplify it. But Poitier has done more for race relations in filmmaking than a thousand civil rights marches over thirty years.

Monte Walsh (2003 TV Movie)

Great detail, put pointless

[7/10 · 27 January 2003]

Better than a lot of westerns, but still there's really nothing there.

I suppose the irony is that this "vanishing way of life" was really only around for about sixty years (ca 1850-1910). It really wasn't that well known east of Missouri outside the popular press, and isn't now outside the movies.

If the western epitomizes the American experience, that's nice, but there have probably been more movie cowboys than there ever were working cowboys. Much more story than practicality.

So, if the above is true, the end of the cowboy way of life is... unlamented, unheralded, and probably unnoticed except for a few.

Monster's Ball (2001)

Arguably the worst film in a decade

[1/10 · 27 January 2003]

This drivel is only slightly better than "Pulp Fiction," which actually rated a -10. It was popular only because Hally Berry, PopHottie of the Moment, got naked with Billy Bob Thornton, Other Hottie of the Moment. The other cast members could have been played by muppets to the same effect.

The plot is trivial and predictable, the acting awful, the cinamatography barely acceptable.

Wish this kind of dreck wouldn't see the light of day, and if neither Berry or Thornton were in it, it wouldn't.

Black Hawk Down (2001)

I've seen worse

[6/10 · 15 January 2003]

As an anti-war film it certainly did its job.

As an anti-American film it could have been better.

As a pro-American military film it almost worked.

As an inditment of the Clinton Administration it lacked a little. Willie Jeff didn't want to send armor into Somalia because that would have "sent the wrong message." So instead we sent home body bags. This happened six months after Waco, and he should have been impeached then.

As an American flag-waver it was an abysmal failure.

As pure entertainment it was sublime.

As history, well, they left out a few things, like the Somali's planning of the encirclements, using the trapped soldiers as bait.

As a demonstration of the hopelessness of our doing anything in Somalia other than standing around and watching the country murder itself it did a great job.

So it's a lot of things at a lot of levels.

Gettysburg (1993)

Mediocre movie based on a mediocre book

[5/10 · 15 January 2003]

Not all that compelling as a film, though it does give a sense of the South's desperation. Shaara's book "Killer Angels" was somewhat compelling at the time for the narrative voice that he gave to characters that before had been wooden. Eliott's and Daniel's performances are the only real shining points.

The worst thing about this film is that its fascination is based on a historical myth: that Gettysburg was the most important battle of the war. With Vicksburg falling the day after, whatever happened at Gettysburg short of the destruction of the Army of the Potomac was quite irrelevant. The Civil War was won and lost in the Western Theatre.

Confederacentrist myth-makers are happy to state that if Meade had lost, the Union would have sued for peace, and other such nonsense.

I won't even bother with "Gods and Generals," written by this author's son, since the book was abomidable.

Zulu (1964)

Entertaining, but not too historical

[8/10 · 15 January 2003]

This is great to watch for a couple of hours, but don't use it in your history course.

Bromhead and his company were sitting on the supply dump because Bromhead was deaf as a stump. He and Chard were very well aquainted when the attacks started, and there was no question of seniority. Bromhead's family was actually less prominent than Chard's.

The Zulus that attacked actually didn't hit Isandhlwana ("Zulu Dawn"), that was a different impi. Besides, when they crossed the river to attack the mission station/supply dump they were in violation of Cetewayo's orders.

Private Hook, a malingering barracks lawyer in the film, was detailed to the hospital as a cook, not a patient.

The Zulu attacks ended after about 20 hours (sometime during the night) and did not continue into a second day.

Other than those major gaffes, the film was vastly entertaining.

Swordfish (2001)

I've seen worse, but not much

[4/10 · 10 October 2002]

Motto: Stealing and killing is OK as long as you're cool doing it.

Halle Berry topless was just gratuitous. The scene had no function in the "plot" and no context. She could have been in a block of cement with the same effect.

I say "plot" loosely because it was really just a story line. There was no mystery, no suspense. The Good Guys win, and the Bad Guys lose. Definition of "good" and "bad" is in the eye of the beholder.

Gee, where did we see that before?

Pulp Fiction (1994)

Disoriented mess

[1/10 · 10 October 2002]

I thought the reels were in the wrong order.

How anyone would think this weird disaster had any redeeming qualities at all is beyond me.

Where's the story line? Is there any continuity to the plot? What's the point?

The Hospital (1971)

Hard to beat

[8/10 · 10 October 2002]

For sheer quality of performance and the "theater of the absurd," this one is hard to compare to anything else. With the world melting down in the early '70s this film made perfect sense then, and still resonates. George Scott could never be typecast.

The Civil War (1990)

Hardly worth the trouble or the expense

[3/10 · 5 August 2002]

There was really nothing new for anyone who has read a few basic studies of the subject. I never could figure out what all the excitement was about.

There was nothing dramatically or editorially interesting about the presentation, and no technical marvels of any sort were displayed. I was thoroughly disappointed.