beardedmovieguy Reviews

King Kong (1933)

8th Wonder Of The Film World

[10/10 · 15 May 2015]

King Kong is an amazing and ambitious cinematic adventure, especially when you take into account that it was made in 1933. The acting is pretty decent, and the story itself is great and has been copied many times, but where it really shines is in the stop motion animation, which may look silly to some now a days, in our cgi world, but for its time, it was a movie marvel. I know Peter Jackson loved this movie enough to remake it, but for my money, his version can't compare with the original, and in truth I wish he wouldn't have tried. Oh, and does Fay Wray have a pair of lungs or what. Check out my video review @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMHK_9ctxzY

Batman Begins (2005)

The Batman I Awlays Wanted

[10/10 · 7 May 2015]

This is the Batman movie that I have been waiting for, not the quirky Tim Burton Batman, and not the Adam West super cheesy Batman and definitely not the terrible terrible George Clooney Batman (love you George, but that was just wrong on every level) but the real honest to Gotham BATMAN. Batman Begins is a completely phenomenal film that is great on every level. Christian Bale did an absolutely amazing job as Bruce Wayne and Batman, and then there is the rest of the cast, Neeson, Murphy, Wilkinson, Oldman and Watanabe, are you kidding me, heck, even Rutger Hauer was great. Overall Christopher Nolan has made a total master piece, a real Batman that is based in reality with all that that implies, and this only gets better when paired with the next two chapters in the saga. 5 Beards Out Of 5

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010)

I'm the Bearded Movie Guy and I'm here to write a review for you to get happy and stuff.

[10/10 · 4 May 2015]

Scott Pilgrim VS The World is an incredibly quirky film that you either love or don't really understand. I for one thought it was awesome. It was funny, had a great cast, kicking soundtrack, was about a bass player for once, ( low end represent!) and was set in my home town, Toronto, which has so many great places to film, it was nice to see it get some movie love. Scott Pilgrim is original, directed perfectly from Edgar Wright and Michael Cera's best movie. All in all this is really cool film, and the comic and video game aspect made it even cooler, plus they have Thomas Jane as a member of the Vegan Police, which made me laugh and that alone makes it worth seeing. Check out my video review @ http://youtu.be/tgU_7f3NcmU

Predator (1987)

If it bleeds, we can kill it, or, at least review it.

[10/10 · 4 May 2015]

This is overall my favorite Arnold movie, and I absolutely love the whole Predator franchise. The movie is very much an 80's flick, but that is a great thing, big muscles, guns and body counts ruled the day, and Predator is no exception. The whole Predator concept is great, I loved the look of it, and the stealth mode still looks good even by today's standards. The use of setting and the score together just totally gear up the tension, and the Predator drum theme is just so memorable. Overall, this is a just a great fun movie. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU. Click click, Predator stalking noise, click, you gotta love it. Check out my video review @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FE0HI9P1Wes

The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Get Busy Watching Shawshank Redemption

[10/10 · 19 March 2015]

The Shawshank Redemption is hands down the best movie of all time. I will type that again, Shawshank Redemption is the best movie.....EVER. Everything about this movie is amazing. This is Tim Robbins best work, Morgan Freeman is perfect as Red in every frame of the film and everybody else is great in their roles. Every time I see this film I love it just a little bit more and it still stands as one of the best examples of hope ever to be put on film. It also has one of the lines in film history, which I have quoted often in my life, "Get busy living, or get busy dying." So overall, a total Masterpiece. 5 Beards Out Of 5 Check out my video review @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W5PyYKla1G8

Cinderella (I) (2015)

Not Quite Magical, But Not Bad

[7/10 · 17 March 2015]

Disney seems to be running out of ideas for new movies so they keep going to the well of their classic fairy tales. Now, after how they completely changed the story of Sleeping Beauty in the live action film Maleficent, I was pretty tentative about seeing their live action version of Cinderella, but to my nice surprise, they did not actually change the core story. The Cinderella that you grew up with and for many know and love is pretty much all there, and in truth looks beautiful. Kenneth Branagh does a very nice job directing this terrifically casted movie. Cate Blanchett is in full effect as the evil step-mother, showing off how ugly such a beautiful woman could be. Lily James is great in the title role, personifying kindness and courage as is the theme of the movie. Richard Madden is quite good as the Prince, and the rest of the cast performs adequacy. In fact, the only acting I did not like was Helena Bonham Carter as the fairy godmother, it just seemed a little to on the nose, but thankfully she only is in the movie for a few minutes. Overall Cinderella is a beautiful, nicely shot film that most families will like and most little girls will absolutely love. I can only hope they do as good a job on the live action Beauty and the Beast movie that they are planning to do next. 3.5 Beards Out Of 5 Check out my video review @ https://youtu.be/bQR5BJnkn2k

The Two Faces of January (2014)

Has A Few Moments, But Not Enough

[5/10 · 17 March 2015]

The Two Faces Of January is a bit of a weird film. The cast was talented enough with both Viggo Mortensen and Oscar Isaac giving good performances, and Kristen Dunst was good for what the role required of her. But even with this cast it very often felt like it was not sure what kind of movie it wanted to be. It had a kinda lovers on the lamb kind of feel, and then at many points reminded me of other better films, such as The Talented Mr. Ripley, only with much less suspense to it. The story itself is very slow paced and even when it goes somewhere it doesn't really seem to go anywhere, or, at least that's how it feels. and then the third act is really fast paced but still fairly dull. Overall I really would not recommend this unless you are die hard Viggo Mortensen fans, or love looking at mostly brown and grey scenery. 2.5 Beards Out Of 5

Grosse Pointe Blank (1997)

You Can't Go Home Again...But You Can Shop There

[8/10 · 17 March 2015]

This is one of the best comedies of the 90's and is one of my favorite John Cusack roles. Martin Blank is cool, funny and completely badass. I liked this movie cause it was pretty original,was filmed well, the acting was good all the way around, and how can you not like a movie where Dan Aykroyd is an evil hit man. Add to that Jeremy Piven, Joan Cusack and Minnie Driver,well, it is just plain great. Add to that the totally rocking soundtrack and fun action set pieces and you got yourself a good time. I have yet to go to a real high-school reunion myself, but if I do I am going to tell people that I am a hit man, and no, that doesn't come with dental. Awesome. 4 Beards Out Of 5

Fire Birds (1990)

Full Tilt Boogie Goodness

[5/10 · 16 March 2015]

I loved this movie when I was younger, and liked it now that I have seen it again. Back then I thought Nicolas Cage's character was so cool, now he is still kinda cool but man is there way too much overacting from Cage and pretty much everybody else, well except for Sean Young, who kinda doesn't act, she is just there, like a cardboard cut out of her with a tape player saying her lines would have be just as real, maybe even better. Thankfully Tommy Lee Jones is great, and I have used the Full Tilt Boogie line a bunch of times. So, decent movie, cool helicopters and Tommy Lee Jones is just too awesome for his own good. 3 Beards Out Of 5

Taxi Driver (1976)

Two words, De Niro!

[9/10 · 16 March 2015]

Certain films are iconic in themselves or for certain lines, Taxi Driver falls into both categories. I have often heard it talked about and I could not even begin to count how many times I have heard people say the lines, "You talking to me, are you, talking to me, you must be talking to me cause I don't see anybody else here.". So saying that, I finally got around to seeing it and I think it is a really good movie, probably not as great as everybody thinks it is, but overall I liked it a lot. De Niro does an excellent job as Travis Bickle, you really get the feeling of isolation while being in the middle of everyone, and the score and city itself really helps with that. If I was judging this movie on acting alone I would give it 5 stars, but due to the amount of swearing, the fact that Bickles idea of a nice date is to go to a pornographic movie and the child prostitution kinda makes it lose some stars, but I do understand some of that is necessary for the story. The cast for Taxi Driver was really good too, and I don't think I have ever seen Harvey Keitel look that young before. So overall Taxi Driver was pretty darn amazing, although I doubt Bickle would have survived with that many wounds, and if he did, I am pretty sure he would have been thrown in to jail for what he did, but what do you want, its a movie. 4.5 Beards Out Of 5

Dawn of the Dead (2004)

Running Zombies, Oh Crap!

[7/10 · 15 March 2015]

I have been watching a lot of Zombie stuff lately, so that I will be prepared for the coming Zombie Apocalypse, so I finally got around to seeing Zack Snyders version of the George Romero's classic, and I have to say, good job Zack. It is not a perfect movie and some of the things don't make much sense to me, like if the guy with the sniper rifle was sitting on a gun shop with lots of ammo, why was he not killing more zombies, heck, he could have taken out pretty much everyone that was there and they could have took a nice gingerly drive to the marina, but overall it is a pretty good depiction of what would happen if there was a zombie outbreak, and I am now that much more prepared for what is coming around the bend, so that makes it worth seeing all by itself, although it could have done without the nudity. 3.5 Beards Out Of 5

Frankenstein (1931)

Monster Royalty

[8/10 · 14 March 2015]

This movie comes off as silly at times and brilliant at others, but it is probably considered to be one of the greatest monster movies of all time. The greatest thing to come out of this movie was the performance of Boris Karloff as the monster, it is just incredible how much emotion and feeling he was able to convey while under all that makeup. The direction of James Whale is spot on with a great use of sets and outdoor locations, in fact, the only real flaw in the film lies in the script, which has a few situations that make very little sense and because of which interrupts the films flow. But other than that, Frankenstein is a classic and very important movie, and it launched Karloff on to a great career, plus the sequel Bride Of Frankenstein is even better. 4 Beards Out Of 5 Check out my video review @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GomHi6vIds4

The Prestige (2006)

Are you watching closely!

[10/10 · 14 March 2015]

This has got to be one of the best movies ever made that looks at the lives of illusionists and the great pains they have gone through in times past. The Prestige has an amazing and talented cast, with Christian Bale, Hugh Jackman, Michael Caine, Scarlett Johansson and Ricky Jay, all putting in terrific performances, playing their roles perfectly. Also, how awesome was David Bowie as Nikola Tesla, what perfect casting on Nolan's part. Speaking of Nolan, I have yet to see him make a bad movie, in fact, his movies just keep on getting better and better. Between the awesome script both he and his brother wrote, and the breath taking cinematography of Wally Pfister, Prestige is utterly perfect. And what an ending, it made want to watch it again right away, just incredible. 5 Beards Out Of 5 Check out my video review @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZS19QL3VAkk

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)

Talent can't fix a broken script.

[5/10 · 12 March 2015]

A good looking film, and Andrew Garfield gets the tone of Spidey right, but the plot is silly and bloated with unneeded subplots that go nowhere. Plus Jamie Foxx was terrible in this, he is a terrific actor when given good material, but this was awful. Sony really does not know how to make a good Spider-man movie, which is a pity cause it should be very easy to do with all the source material and history of the character. Thankfully they are finally allowing Spider-man to go home to Marvel and get their help in making an awesome Spider-man film, I just wish it hadn't taken so long for it to happen. 2.5 Beards Out Of 5 Check out my review http://youtu.be/PIP6_qESx-Q And my Spoiler Rant http://youtu.be/CU-r28-_xqE

Se7en (1995)

The Rainy City Holds A Lot Of Secrets

[10/10 · 12 March 2015]

Wow, here is the thing, most movies that have been out for a long time and I have been told that are great but have not got a chance to see yet, well, most of the time they never live up to the hype. That is not the case with Se7en. This is one amazing movie. The acting was stellar, directing was spot on and the use of the city and rain added so much atmosphere that it was almost another character in the film. I did see the end coming even though I was hoping that I was wrong.(I think I knew what was coming not because this movie was predictable, more so that after this movie lots of movies and TV shows have stolen from it, so it kind of easy to see where it was going, I am sure if I had seen this when it was first out I would have been surprised) This is a five star movie that I think will still be great 50 years from now. 5 Beards Out Of 5 Check out my video review. http://youtu.be/WCVDBOziSrM

Night of the Living Dead (1968)

The Godfather Of Zombie Movies

[9/10 · 12 March 2015]

The zombie movies that set the tone for all those that followed. I like how this begins, with just two siblings visiting a graveyard to pay respects to their father, and then a stranger starts attacking them and they have no clue why. That's why this works so well, cause it places the viewer in a situation that seems normal, and then quickly changes, and by the end of the movie you are left to ask the question, Who is the bigger danger, the Zombies or the "Normal People"? The acting is a little sketchy in some places, but that is to be expected for a low budget movie with no professional actors, but it has held remarkably well over time. Classic, just classic. 4.5 Beards Out Of 5 Check out my video review @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcHYjLQxXnY

Kelly's Heroes (1970)

Clint Eastwood Heisting Gold In War, I'm In!

[8/10 · 11 March 2015]

Kelly's Heroes is a fun World War 2 Heist movie with a fantastic cast including Clint Eastwood, Telly Savalas and Donald Sutherland. Kelly and a bunch of soldiers go 30 miles behind enemy lines to rob a bank holding 16,000 gold bars. This is much easier said then done since there are a lot of German soldiers, and when they are not fighting them or walking through mine fields, they still have to contend with their own air force shooting at them or bombing the bridges they need to use. The action in Kelly's Heroes is fairly realistic, and there is a great tank scene near the end, but where it really shines is with the cast being allowed to play off each other and Donald Sutherland just stealing every scene he is in. Kelly's Heroes is well made, and quite enjoyable, so if you are in the mood for a not quite traditional war/heist movie, then Kelly is your man. 4 Beards Out Of 5 Check out my video review @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18lA6u1kcfc

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975)

You would have to be crazy not to watch this movie.

[10/10 · 11 March 2015]

The more I see older Jack Nicholson films, the more I understand why people think he is such a great actor. One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest is definitely one of those movies that would not be made the same if made today, and as far as I can tell, it is actually pretty accurate for the way mental hospitals worked at the time. The story of a sane man playing crazy and then trying to make the other patients sane while making the nurses crazy, it just has to be seen to be believed. The story is interesting and kinda heartbreaking in the end, (note to self, never fall asleep during an escape attempt, bad things will happen) and it has a great young cast that has gone on to do some great things with Danny DeVito, Christopher Lloyd and Brad Dourif all turning in terrific performances. And yeah, Nurse Ratched is just plain evil. Now excuse me while I rip a sink out of the ground and throw it through a window, I have places to go. 5 Beards Out Of 5 Check out my video review https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1chSHnt4zSg

All Quiet on the Western Front (1930)

One of the best Anti-war Movie Ever

[10/10 · 10 March 2015]

Well done movie that was influential enough that at least 2 remakes were made of it. It is pretty interesting, it is a war movie, but it is from the German perspective, starting with how the a group of youth are convinced to join the war effort by their teacher, being told it will be glorious and fun to fight and die for their Motherland. These same boys are all shocked when they finally do get in the war at how loud and ugly it is, and they are forced to grow up real fast as their friends are dying all around them. The story is good, and it looks decent considering when it was made. It is also cool to see when one of the boys who is now a man comes back and sees the teacher that talked him into going, just to find him giving the exact same speech that motivated him to a new class of teens. He is then asked to tell the students all about the glory of war, which he can't and after telling the kids how it really is, they consider him a coward and a traitor. All Quiet On The Western Front does a great job of showing war as the terrible thing it is, and how it is very different for those fighting compared to those who stay behind and criticize from the safety of their homes. Check out my video review https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uIjFsdowDeg 5 Beards Out Of 5

Casablanca (1942)

Lives Up To Its Legend

[10/10 · 10 March 2015]

Casablanca is everything that people say it is. The story is sharp, the writing is crisp and the delivery from the whole cast, in particularly Humphrey Bogart is flawless. From location, to music, to just the overall incredibly coolness that the movie just exudes, Casablanca is a timeless classic that will still be perfect hundreds of years from now. It has awesome iconic characters, stellar acting from Bogart and Rains, while Ingrid Bergman is simply stunning and incredibly graceful in her delivery. Casablanca is easily one of the greatest movies ever made, and should be required viewing for any film fan. Check out my video review. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOGZsc-FyNk 5 Beards Out Of 5

Groundhog Day (1993)

I Could Watch Bill Murray Everyday

[10/10 · 10 March 2015]

Groundhog Day is a great movie with a terrific original premise. Having the main character Phil, played by Bill Murray, be a easily unlikable character allows for some great storytelling and character development that you don't get a chance to have in other films. By giving Phil unlimited days to grow and change, while everyone around him will always remains unchanged, only highlights Phil's journey to become a better man that much more. In that journey there is a lot of comedy, with terrific directing from Harold Ramis, and one of Murray's best performances. I love this movie, and no matter how many times I see it I always enjoy it, and it who doesn't love seeing a groundhog driving a pickup truck. Check out my video review https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u0Hr0ox9BaY

5 Beards Out Of 5

Last Vegas (2013)

Sadly The Script Does Not Live Up To The Talent.

[6/10 · 4 March 2015]

The big selling point of Last Vegas is definitely the cast. Robert De Niro, Morgan Freeman, Kevin Kline and Michael Douglas are all great actors in their own respects, and it makes complete sense that they would all be great together, which they are, to a point. The point I am talking about is the script and story. To have these acting heavy weights in this movie seems like a bit of overkill, but when you watch Last Vegas, and realize the story is nowhere on par with the actors telling it, it makes sense. Now saying that, I actually did enjoy watching Last Vegas, it had some funny parts and I can watch Morgan Freeman in pretty much anything, but for the most part all the jokes were either very underwhelming and you could see their set ups a mile away. Plus relying on so many aging tropes in one movie got old real quick, (pun intended). The truth of Last Vegas is this, without the big name cast, it could have easily been a TV movie or a running sitcom, and that just seemed like a waste of talent to me.

3 Beards Out Of 5

I, Frankenstein (2014)

Sad!!!!!!!!!!!

[3/10 · 3 March 2015]

I wish this was a better movie, Aaron Eckhart is a really good actor, and he tries his best to polish this turd, as does Bill Nighy, but it is just not a good movie. It seems like it should have be called Underworld 17, except you have gargoyles and demons and Frankenstein's monster instead of vamps and wolves. The effects are very run of the mill, the character development pretty much nonexistent and the action is terrible. Overall it had some potential but I was actually bored after about 10 minutes and just kept on waiting for something cool to happen, sadly nothing ever did, but does have the Yvonne Strahovski from the TV show Chuck in it, so there's that.

1.5 Beards Out Of 5

Enemies Closer (2013)

Eco Friendly Drug Dealer, Really?

[4/10 · 3 March 2015]

Van Damme is a environmentally concerned drug runner with weird hair who has lost his latest shipment and needs a park rangers help to get it back. Picture the movie Cliffhanger with out the talent, budget and John Lithgow being super creepy. I know Van Damme has made some bad movies in his career, but for the most part you would never have called him flat out boring, until Enemies Closer. It has some mediocre action, and mentions canoes more then other movie since Deliverance, which is not something to really brag about, but there is very little else to say about this very boring movie.

2 Beards Out Of 5

3 Days to Kill (2014)

Snooze Of A Spy Movie

[4/10 · 3 March 2015]

A spy/assassin movie that has one bright spot, Kevin Costner. He is a dying company man who is trying to reconnect with his wife and daughter and is a little too obsessed with a purple bicycle. This is not a terrible movie, but it's tone is incredibly uneven and silly in parts, plus Amber Heard just seemed to be way too much out of her element to be believable. The action is very boring and there are just way too many subplots that really go no where and distract from the story.Overall this is a waste of Costner, who should at this point in his career being picking better movies then this and is sadly just very forgettable.

2 Beards Out Of 5